A week ago four teens playing near a creek in Cerro Azul, a community in the northern part of Panama City, encountered the creature, which they claim approached them. The teens threw rocks and beat the animal to death before returning to take pictures. The photos reveal a white hairless creature with clawed toes. Other than its lack of fur, the animal closely resembles a three-toed sloth, a mammal found widely in the Central American country.
Nevertheless the local media has played up the story, reporting that zoologists are unable to identify the "alien-like" creature. But DNA testing should soon confirm what most are saying: the animal is a sloth.
As a consequence of a slow news cycle towards the end of summer, August and September tend to be peak months for sightings of "strange" and "unidentified" creatures including unusual marine life, malformed animals and the mythological beasts like the Chupacabra, the Mongolian Death Worm, Big Foot, and the Loch Ness Monster.
As you see here, many say that this creature is likely to be a sloth. Well, we, Neko and Teko, think otherwise. We believe that it really is an alien, come with it's whole planet to capture our jello!
Some ways to prevent them from taking your jello are:
-Hide it
-cover it with spaghetti (they hate spaghetti)
-eat it all now
Where are more of these hiding? We're interviewing Alientologist Mike Peters just to find out.
"They most probably live in holes with the ground hogs right now. But come February, they will go out of their holes to see their shadows and if they can't, they run to Brazil. There are ways to capture them though. One is to out a net over the right ground hog hole. The next is to close the borders to Brazil."
Mike gave us some useful information, but we can't use it until February 2nd. If you have any more ideas, leave a comment with this article.
This is Neko and Teko reporting form the nearest groundhog hole, waiting.
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