The Cab and the Dinosaur

We got the chance to hear this amazing story from Zach Cleverland. A taxi driver. We were on the scene. On the side of the road was Zach Cleverland covered in saliva, His Cab was all scratched. "So, Zach are you a taxi driver?" We asked him. "Yes, and an artist on the side." He replied as he took a blob of goo from his hair and threw it to the road. "What happened?" Teko asked. "Well.." He took a deep breath. "I'll tell you." "I was going home for the day, my shift was done, I started up my cab and drove around 2 Cm then this flying Dinosaur came and ate me. I was shocked of course, Soon, I found myself in the stomach of this beast. I knew there was probably only one way to get out. So, I waited and painted a picture. I had my art supplies in the cab. I was covered in saliva too. I painted what the creature looked like. (He gave us a copy of the picture)
Then, The weirdest thing happened. This Sandwich Guy was somehow there, He just appeared, and he called over this Blue Guy who gave my half of a sandwich, which I ate up of course I was hungry. "How did you get a sandwich in here?" I asked them.
"We have little secrets" They said. The blue guy looked like a alien with blue wrinkly skin. The Sandwich guy had these big dorky glasses. I was not very fond of them I admit. Anyway, I started to get worried, I have 5000 kids at home, and I started to miss my office and my regular cup of hot coco. Plus, I was curious, were dinosaurs supposed to be dead? So I asked the blue guy if there was a way to get out of here.
"Oh yes." He took out a feather out of an unknown pocket. I drew it later just now.
It was a rainbow colored. The blue guy then started tickling the stomach of the flying beast. It started shaking and then The Beast burped and out I came.
Then, I realized I was covered in saliva and I painted the feather quickly and I better take a shower." Zach Told us his shocking story.
"Thanks for letting us interview you!" We called out!
"No Problem." He said back.
Well, that was a shocking story of the Cab and the Dinosaur.
Scientists are at work now seeing if it is possible for flying dinosaurs to be alive.
This Blue Guy is popping up a lot. EWWWW! GROSS! Teko just stepped into a big glob of dinosaur saliva. There is a ton on the street. I started laughing. Then EWWW! I stepped in a glob too. In minutes Scientists were swarming us picking up some of the gross globs and putting them in little bags. Probably For tests.
Anyway, Hope you enjoyed this shocking story that we reported on first!
This is Neko and Teko reporting from Dinosaur Saliva infested areas on the street!

The SandWich Guy

The Sandwich Guy?
Who is he?
Well, we are going to tell you!
Neko and Teko are the ones who reported this first!
The Sandwich guy, You don't want to meet him:
We will tell you why later.
The Sandwich guy is bald and wears these ugly dorky glasses.
He can make tons of Sandwiches.
From Gossip Sandwich to Zoo Sandwich.
He is used for punishment. Now we'll tell you why he is dangerous.
Here is the Story of John Sheridan when he met the sandwich guy.

John had been captured for no reason. Just because he had planned to attack earth and kill the President. Anyway, It was his second day of being locked up. John had been shocked many times by the Ugly rubber thing on his neck that smelt of burnt rubber. When John thought it couldn't get any worse....It did. In he walked, With his dorky glasses, and a wrapped up Sandwich in his hand he directed John to a metal chair, This man was the Sandwich Guy, The Sandwich guy sat down and unwrapped a sandwich, he started eating it. Then John said he wanted a sandwich. The Sandwich Guy called over a blue guy and he gave John half of his sandwich.

Why is The Sandwich Guy so Dangerous?
Because he will call over the blue guy and the blue guy will give you half of his sandwich, Also Wolverine doesn't like the Sandwich guy.
This is Neko and Teko reporting from John Sheridan's office where he told us the horrible Story of the Sandwich guy.

Warning, Don't take a sandwich from the Blue Guy!

Lady Ga Ga-Paparazzi

Do you think Lady Ga Ga is tired of the Paparazzi?
We got to Interview her.
"What do you want in your life? What is your goal?" We asked her.
"I want to take one of Wolverine's Abs, and put it in a purse and name it Meap!" She said.
"I'm not that tired of the Paparazzi, I like the attention, and I devoted a whole song to them, so they are not that bad, I don't like that guy in the video though." (see lady gaga's Paparazzi video)
Anyway, The new fashion tread, Wolverine's abs in pets are supposedly cute in purses. Well, You know what they say, Do what Lady Gaga says, Or do they say that?
Ps, Lady Ga Ga dresses weird. Anyway, Don't you love the Paparazzi, they make such good songs about us don't they?
This is the Paparazzi signing out.
AKA Neko and Teko

Harry Potter Hits the Big Screen

Harry Potter just hit the Big Screen with his New movie: Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.
It's not a movie I would see. Look at him. Look at Harry Potter, He never smiles in that photo he just farted and his face is still Serious. See that is His Serious Farting Face.
Anyway, I should not be making fun of his Farting Face because every one has a different Farting Face.
Anyway, at the Permeire of the New Harry Potter Movie: Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.
Harry Potter rode in on his Fart powered broomstick. (with his serious fart face of course) and was carrying his DVD of the Harry Potter Movie: The Half Blood Prince. Then with the DVD he hit the big screen and slammed right into it. Harry Potter was not embarrassed at all. People just looked at him and blocked their noses. (Blocking it from the smell) Plus, Harry Potter has a big nose.
I don't get Harry Potter anyway? Seriously? How can a Prince be half blooded?
I think he would die very quickly. Harry Potter farted again ( A big one) and flew off.
When is he going to graduate from High School anyway. IF he has saved the world like 100 times. At the End of the movie, I interviewed some of the "fans"
"Har-ry Pot-ter." One man said and laughed.
"I like Harry Potter and all, but you y'all know he should wear some cologne you know?" A teenage girl flying a red kite said.
Out of 5 Stars. I would rate it 2.4 times better than the first one. And 7.0 Times better than the 18th one.
Anyway I would rate it 0 stars since I have only seen commercials!
This Is Neko reporting. Teko is a big Harry Potter Fan...
So she would not like me saying mean stuff about Harry Potter's Serious Fire Face and Nose.
One last thing.
Harry Potter has a weird nose. :D

Storms

Today in Weather...
It will be stormy and have a chance of big banging rock music.
On Tuesday It will be Stormy with a big banging of Rock Music.
ON Wednesday It will be stormy with Justin Timberlake Falling from the Sky.
On Thursday, A big face will appear out of nowhere.
On Friday It will be doomsday!

Anyway today's top story!
Super Man was drinking beer.
Wolverine came up to him and said. "BUB give me back my beer." Wolverine snarled. "No!" Super man yelled. Then he turned into Madonna. Then Wolverine got really mad. I mean really really mad.
Superman farted, then a big face appeared out of nowhere and the world Blew Up.

Okay the World didn't blow up. But it swirled into a chaos of storms and big faces.

Okay so it didn't swirl into a chaos of storms.

The face appeared and took the beer. So Wolverine bought some more beer. (He had stolen money from Iron Man)
Then superman farted and the population went down.
Pokemon people came and started yelling weird stuff. Baguakon (something like pokemon) Came and ate the face.
Thanks for enjoying the Weather.
This Is Neko and Teko reporting about the weather. (It's more Exciting then you think)
If you have any ideas for articles.
Please Comment!

Purple Tongues

This is Neko and Teko reporting from the North Pole where Penguins and polar bears and beer lives.
What happened is A bear decided to drink some beer.
The beer had gone bad so The bear got swine flu turned into a pig and got a purple tongue.
Weird....
So the bear eventually turned back into a bear using our Swine Flu cure. (I know we are soo awesome)
But, the bear still had the purple tongue.
Being Awesome like we are we made a cure for the purple tongue disease .
Which is eating popcorn, smelling bad smells (like farts), watching retarded Superman movies from the 1800's, and last but not least, Looking at Wolverine's Abs!
Warning, Side affects may include, an obsession for Wolverine's Abs!
Jumping at Beer bottles, dancing with brooms, mild scratching, highly cautioned farting and eating beer bottles and spitting your tongue out.
This is Neko and Teko reporting from the North Pole place with bad beer!

I'm all Blades and Beer

Wolverine is mad at the ceiling. Well, we think he is...
He is staring at the ceiling.
So, Since Neko and Teko are on Vacation next week and may not be able to report... so we decided to write another article this week so you don't miss us!
Ok, If you read the article below this you know Iron Man was mad at the floor for taking his beer.
Wolverine is really obsessed with his beer. We decided to interview him.
"So, why are you mad?" We asked.
"I'm Wolverine, I'm all blades and beer. Okay, I went to the black grocery store place with smoke, And, (he snarls) They were out of Beer!" He answered.
"So, why don't you go to another store?" We asked.
"Who do you think I am Iron Man?" He snarled. (He snarls a lot)
Then Wolverine did something really weird. He took off his shirt. AHHHHH!
"What are you doing?" A mysterious voice called out. We turned and there was an old lady there. Wolverine made a angry face and shot out his blades. (Like in the picture)
"Don't you point those dirty things at me! Do you wash those things?" The old lady person yelled.
"Listen here Grandma!" Wolverine yelled. Pointing his blades at the old lady.
The Grandma person took out a pink purse and started hitting him.
"Put a shirt on!" She demanded. "Okay Lady! What's your problem?" He snarled (again) "Who are you calling Grandma?" The Lady Said. "What?" Wolverine snarled.
"I can't understand you Logan with all that snarling!" The Lady turned into Emma Frost. "Emma?" Wolverine gasped while snarling. "I'm not Emma, I'm Wynter!" She said. She turned into the girl who sings in the song Sugar by Flo-Rida. Then Flo-rida appeared and started singing. "What is wrong with you people? All I want is Beer!" Wolverine snarled. "Put a shirt on." Someone begged. "Alright!" Wolverine agreed.
"I'm going to destroy a Tv or something..." Wolverine walked out.
"Then some person named Bruno came out and flew a kite...
Anyway
This Is Neko and Teko reporting from the smoke grocery store place
Remember Wolverine Is All Blades And Beer

Iron Man- Floor Madness

Iron Man is very mad at the floor!
For some reason he does not like carpets.
Ya, Superheros can get a little coco after a while. So, Neko and Teko are on the scene asking why Iron Man is made at the Floor!
"Actually I am not mad at the floor I am mad at the carpet."
He confessed. "Why?" We asked.
(Hey we are reporters we ask a lot of questions)
"They yell and make fun of me! Plus they stole my Beer, It was no ordinary Beer it was cheesed flavored." He added.
"So what are you going to do about it?" We asked again.
"Punch it until It gives me my beer back." Iron Man yelled.
Then all of a sudden Iron Man made squeaking Guinea Pig noises while punching the floor.
Okay...
I think Iron Man may need to see a doctor.
Then the other "not as cool as us Press showed up"
"Tony Stark." They started Yelling!
"How do they know my identity?" He questioned. His face shocked. (how is that possible when he is wearing iron?) "Uh, Duh, Your on TV and in comics!" Teko pointed out. "I will forget my madness at the carpet, I will hunt down these so called "comics" and stop them from doing anymore evil!" Iron Man said Mechanical.
Then theme song music started playing out of no where! In a Jump and a Leap and wires attached to his suit, Iron Man flew off into the painted sunset.
This is Neko and Teko reporting from Carpet place that eats beer!

"Laffy Taffy" Is not that Laffy.

Don't Trust that picture!
I know what you are thinking.
"Mmmm, that candy reminds me of wolverine's abs."
Okay You probably are not thinking that.
This Candy is Evil.
Now, If you look in the corner, you will see a green package labeled "Laffy Taffy."
See Laffy Taffy started the invasion.
We are getting ahead of ourselves.
Laffy Taffy, sneak into police stations all over North America, you see the police went,
"OMG! Free Laffy Taffy!" So they ate it you know. Then they burst out loud in laughter. The Laffy Taffy had some how made it so they burst out laughing.
Pure Evil....
They created an army of Candy and went to attack the police stations trying to take over North America (Finally someone who doesn't want to take over the world)
How were they stopped from turning the North America countrys into a candy land (Yay!)
They were kinda eaten... All of them so none of them were left.
To Celebrate!
Laffy Taffy for everyone!
This is Neko and Teko Reporting from The Candy Place with Laffy Taffy!

Revenge Of the Wafer Cookies!

Don't let these yummy looking cookies fool you! They may look like a yummy treat but, they have broke almost all the laws!
Okay, some are okay, The ones that broke the laws are apart of R.O.T.W.C. (Revenge of the Wafer Cookies)
We decided to talk to a police officer about this. His name was Bobby Bobtis Bobbilons.

"So, how much laws has these wafer cookies broke?" We asked.
"Uh, almost every one, they have robbed banks, stolen jewels, speeding down the highway..." He explained,
"Wait, How do they do this?" We interrupted.
"They just slide, around, I guess no one suspects a wafer cookie." He said,
"Do they have a weakness?" We asked.
"Oh, ya and a punishment!" He got up and left the room.
He came back in 2 minutes carrying a jar of squirming wafer cookies.
One was Pink, three were white, and two were chocolate.
Bobby Bobtis Bobilons, took one from the jar,
"This is Sweetheart." He said holding the pink one in the air.
"Noooo," The pink cookie screamed.
But it was to late, Bobby Bobtis Bobilons has swallowed and chewed up Sweetheart the pink cookie.
We each "punished" a wafer cookie.
This is Neko and Teko reporting from The police station.
If you see a wafer cookie moving around by itself, eat it or call the police if you are allergic!

Common Cold and Swine Flu connected?

Swine Flu and the Common Cold Connected?

We went out to Investigate! We met an evil scientist farmer dude guy!

We looked at some of his notes.

It turns out that he had a cure for H1N1 aka The Swine Flu.

You see he had a cure for the common cold and that cure can also cure swine flu!

So, people won't have to turn into purple pigs and be obessed with kraft dinner anymore! Right as you read this tons of the medicine is being prosseed but won't be ready until June of 2010. (It takes a long time to make) But, don't worry even though it smells really really really like farmer's ketcup mixed with smelly socks and pig liver and kraft dinner. It works, but all you who are purple pigs will probably not be living by that time so we have the recipe. (It's exculsive)

This is Neko and Teko reporting from the Evil Scientist Farmer Dude's lab!

Recipe Swine Flu and Common Cold Cure

( Results may vary)

You will need:

1 Pig Liver

2 boxes of whole wheat kraft dinner

1 container of your grandpa's socks

4 bottles of ketcup that is 2 years old

And a pinch of Pig Manure

Steps:

1. Mix it all together until creamy

2. cook for 10000 hours at 450 degrees ( until scents mix)

3. Serve ( serves 3)

School's Out!

Why is school out?

Because Cheese kinda ate Wolverine, so when wolverine did come out..

(Don't ask how)

He kinda got messed up in the head so he made paper dolls,

the paper dolls turned into minature versions of Wolverine's abs and destroyed school but they did it in the summer so school shuts down during the summer to prevent attacks from the paper dolls!

Enjoy Summer!

Neko and Teko reporting from the beach,

Yes we are in Binkinis!

Slugs take Over Flog...something

I went To see Namer and He gave me a Picture.
Believe it or not, this little guy is an underwater slug.
Anyway, what happened we brought Namer some gifts to thank him for this picture.
(Yes he gave us the picture after we fought with Ben 10 and a penguin came and ate him up before we could defeat him)
So, some of the gifts we brought him were Cheese and all of that stuff.
He really liked the cheese.
Today's story though is this.
Under Water Slugs take over Flogmathiasogathigerta
Under Water slugs came in the thousands and rebelled at why they were bottom feeders. So, something really weird happened, the fish actually came and agreed that the Slugs could be the top feeders....
The Slugs had a hard time staying up there and didn't find any food so they returned to being Bottom Feeders.
The Slugs were mad though, So, they took over the octopus territory known as Flogmathiasogathigerta. The Squids got mad and kinda ate the Slugs Candy so, now they are in War for Flogmathiasogathigerta.. So, Namer kinda blew up a bit of the Slugs so the Slugs kinda ate his Candy. I don't know why people are so obsessed with Candy! We also met a Slug named Hatia He had a cute hat. Looked kinda like the picture. "I plan to get a picture of Wolverine's Abs and use it to force the Octopus's to give over their territory," Then after a blast of light and sound. Hatia was gone. We personally think that the Slugs will win with their secret weapon... This Just In Neko and Teko reporting from Flogmath.. Flogmathia.... Flogsgta... Whatever...

Robo-Carp

This is not a real fish.
I know what you are thinking,
"Oh My goodness it's a fish that swims in peanut butter yay!"
Okay, maybe you are not thinking that...
Anyway, It is actually a robot fish, I think it looks pretty real!
It's name is Robo-Carp
How original.
Anyway, the designers say it's the smartest fish every made, It has artificial intelligence and sensors which it uses to swim away from things in it's way and stuff like that, It's battery lasts for up to five hours!
So, this fish likes pizza and peanut butter! I think he is friends with Wolverine.
Wait, Is it a Boy or a Girl?
Let's get to the point.
Robo Fish have an obsession with peanut butter and can be used to solve the problems of Swine Flu. I don't know about the swine flu stuff.
This Just In Neko and Teko
http://news.nationalgeographic.com

Ps. I don't know why we need a Robo Fish!

Wolverine's abs

I got a request from someone saying that they wanted a picture of Wolverine's Unrealistic abs!
Here is the story on how we got the photo!
We were walking down a beach and we saw wolverine, and this kid. Now if you look really closely you'll see a brave kid looking at his unrealistic abs!
Creepy Huh?
(see achieves X-men Orgins Wolverine)

Anyway we got our photo....
For more info about Wolverine's abs visit
http://pizzaanddonuts.blogspot it's also in the links section of this site!
This just in Neko and Teko reporting from the beach.

Cry about Rae

I cried today, yes, we cried, why?
You know how Rae got blasted by Ottawa?
I can't believe we found out the real truth on what happened.
You see Rae is related to Orange Juice,
We don't know how that is physically possible.
But anyway, He planned the whole Orange Juice attack.
So, absurd came and drank Orange Juice so Rae got mad, then he made Ottawa mad and so on so on, So, Parliament,
Which in this case was Ottawa, blasted Rae out of the "cool" group, so sadly Rae does not get to drink cocktails anymore or wear $6000 suits. Politics is confusing, they always have to use big fancy words! So, instead of drinking orange juice, we must eat kraft dinner before we attempt to drink orange juice to be on the safe side. (See Orange Juice articles in archives ) Anyway, orange juice is full of vitamin C and stuff like that.
For some reason, I think Orange Juice has some connection with forks.
This Just In
Neko and Teko reporting from another confusing case of politics.
(I don't really know who Rae is.)

Ottawa Blasts Rae's absurd Deportation

www.theglobeandmail.com

Some guy named Rae got blasted by Ottawa, I don't know how the heck Ottawa which is a city was able to blast the guy named Rae. First of all, Ottawa can't get up and blast Rae.
If Ottawa was to get up and walk, I just don't think it's possible. Even if Ottawa has somehow defeated the laws of physics, what did Ottawa blast Rae with? Ketchup?
Kraft Dinner? Or maybe Ottawa Blasts Rae has something to do with Politics and Parliament. Now that I am done with the Politics stuff. What I don't get is that Canada and U.S.A. are connected, but yet we have different Politic rules. So instead of having a President or a Prime Minister we should have Premise Minst, So, who do you think should be our next Premise Minst.
Our Candidates are
Wolverine : He thinks things should be more pointy!
Sabertooth: He wants dental care to include sharping fangs
Hammer: .........................
Who do you think should be the next Premise Minst.
So, I know Politics are confusing. So, we should probably get a book on Politics.
This just in
Neko and Teko reporting on a confusing case of Politics!

Ben 10

I didn't have anything to do today so I decided to look around for some small news!
I found this kid eating a lollipop so I asked him if he had done anything exciting!
(Better than staring at frozen cheese. Wait that could have been a good story..)
He said he met Ben 10, I asked him." Where did you meet this Ben 10?" He took a bit of his giant purple lollipop!
"He was doing some kind of alien action evolving thing."
"Where?"
"In my toilet."
So Ben 10 was doing alien action in a toilet.
"It was awesome then santa came and stole Ben 10 so I yelled at him!"
Then the kid went on and on about how Awesome Ben 10 looked in the toilet.
I phoned up Teko and we wrote a story.
I think Grape Juice has something to do with Ben 10.
Ps. Kraft Dinner robbed a bank. (That's another story.)
Pss. Sorry to bring you such a boring story.
This Just In Neko and Teko!
Reporting from some bus thing that eat my Cookie.

Iron Man Steals Michael Jackson's Cheese!

Neko and Teko reporting!
We saw Iron man swipe in and steal Michael Jackson's prized Cheese!
What?!?!? Was a question many people were asking so we decided to find out!
First, we blackmailed Iron Man into telling us why he stole Michael Jackson's Cheese!
(We knew his secret Identity)
He said Ben 10 told him. We asked him how he knew Ben 10.
"I looked into a fridge and I saw his alien action evolving. He looked like old lettuce to be exact." Then he said, "that Ben 10 told him to steal Michael Jackson's Cheese or else
Santa would turn into a fork and stab Wolverine's abs, and then Hannah Mountana and she would eat up his Iron Man suit." Okay.
Oh ya, we also found out that Iron Man drank 30 cases of Beer that night. "I also married Dora in my sleep then she ate my CHEESE." He complained.
This just in Neko and Teko
Never give Iron Man beer. (Or cheese favored beer.)
Before we left, Iron man said one more thing.
"Wolverine looks like The Easter Bunny."

Pizza and Donuts

My friend made a website and I wrote some articals for it!
It's called Pizza and Donuts!
http://pizzaanddonuts.blogspot.com
It has some really cool articles!
Please visit and Thanks
~Neko